Pirates attack!

Last Sunday, the Dodgers were so whiney, so miserable, that I began to wonder if I cared more about being at the ballyard than they did. And, if that was the case, why the hell was a I there?

But on Wednesday, as D.G. and I pulled into a parking spot, I almost went blind due to the amount of bright orange Dodger jerseys that were dashing in front of me, playing catch, swinging bats...and smiling.

The Dodgers were ready to play some ball. The Dodgers had pride. The Dodgers had heart.

The Dodgers had only one run the entire game.

We lost 9-1.

Those heartless Pirates took our bats hostage and there were no Navy snipers in suburban Philadelphia to rescue them. We just couldn't get a hit all game. However, not one out was caused by a thrown bat, which was a nice, calming change of pace for the umpire, who also noticed that the Dodgers, although magnificent losers yet again, were a different team.

"Damn, baby, when I got to the field and saw those orange uniforms, I was like "oh no baby, duck and cover"," said the umpire. "But these boys look so much better, better attitude, better attention. Glad to see it, baby."

Baby was happy to see it too.

Injury update:

Marquise: the only kid to catch a ball in Sunday's massacre is on the DL after injecting himself in the finger with a mechanical pencil. When will baseball get serious enough to keep these substances out of the game, or at least out of boys' pockets business end up?

Willie: famous for uttering "This is Wilie's house!" after tagging a kid out at the plate in game 1, showed us exactly where Willie's house is this past Wednesday.

An assisted living facility.

The boy made the best throw of his life to second on a steal attempt, only to shout at the coaches after we congratulated him, "I'm not throwing like that again, it hurts my back!" He then yelled for his mother to massage him when they got home. He then complained about his shoulder, then his, ankle. He then drifted off to sleep behind the plate, awoke suddenly, and screamed "Damn Jerry's! I'll get you but good!"

These kids crack me up...
...it just takes a few days for my blood pressure to settle down.